After the Mr Honey Man date I decided to be a little more proactive in my questioning of potential dates. If a potential date couldn’t in his instant messages, e-mails or phone calls discuss a range of topics I politely but firmly broke it off as I figured if they had a one topic mind they where probably going to either be boring as bat shit or obsessive neither of which match my “Cookie cutter idea of perfect” .
The next guy I decided to communicate with kicking off with instant messages, moving onto e-mail and finally phone calls seemed like a bit of a catch. He was funny and intelligent and well rounded on topics of conversation and even when we disagreed on a topic he wasn’t rude or obnoxious but could argue in a way that was none threatening. My only hmmm was the fact that he was always at home which he explained by telling me he worked from home as a programmer but the fact his landline never went to voicemail did make me wonder when this guy ever went out. I’ll admit I asked probing questions and he talked about friends and family and events he’d been involved in during the week so I stopped worrying. At one point in time I called and his mum answered, she seemed a little over excited to know her boy had a new lady in his life and let slip it had been a couple of years since he’d broken up with his x-girlfreind and made suggestions that maybe we should meet for coffee, considering I hadn’t even been on a date with him yet I politely declined, but her chatter had told me he came from a close knit family and was defiantly single. I probably should have wondered why she insisted I take down her number just incase I needed to call her but I just went “meh whatever so she’s a pushy mum probably at the I want grandkids point”.
Anyway after about 3 weeks of getting to know each-other there was still no indication of meeting in person so I decided to broach the subject of meeting for coffee. This is where the story turns into one of those OMG are you kidding me moments. At the suggestion of meeting for coffee he totally freaked out and told me it couldn’t happen and sounding very angry he hung up on me. About an hour later he rang back and explained that it freaked him out as he hadn’t been expecting it and he was sorry for being rude but he’d had a panic attack and had to ring his Psychiatrist who advised him to take his meds, do his breathing and ring me back to explain the situation after all I seemed like a perfectly nice young lady. It turns out he forgot to mention he suffered server Agoraphobia and hadn’t left his house in 10 years and I could go and visit him but I would need to wear a hazadus materials suit so I didn’t bring evil grems into his world.
I’ll admit I was a little dumb struck and when he asked what I was thinking I flippantly said “I’m trying to figure out how to tell my boss that I need to borrow a HazMat suit so I can go visit a friend”. This is when he finally thought to ask a few more in-depth questions about who I worked for because up to now I’d simply said I was a public servant. Well when he found out I work on Deployed Logistic Project in Defence his freak out level went from 10 deep breaths and a Valium to fix to apocalyptic he was probably going to need hospitalisation. Halfway through his rant about how I wasn’t going to be able to trick him into revealing what he know and he should have know I was one of THEM who worked for the evil empire etc I hung up on him and rang his mum to tell her I might have accidentally sent him off the rails and she might want to go check on him.
Since I had a free night and needed a drink I rang a couple of girlfriends who agreed to meet me at the pub and over dinner rolled around laughing at what had happened. As it turned out all of us had OMG are you kidding stories from the weekend so I didn’t feel to bad about what had happened. His mum rang me a few days later to assure me he was ok if a little heavier medicated than normal and to thank me for thinking to ring her when he blew up and to see if maybe there was a possibility we might get back together, I had to very delicately tell her no not going to happen but good luck for the future.